This week: A Room of Mirrors
We all live “in our own world." Truth. But never has that fact become more blatant- and yet more cleverly obscured- than it is today. Why? Two words: Social media. If you know what I’m about to say, welcome me to the club on this. If you don’t, I’m gonna play Eve real quick and “Let me blow ya mind.” (RIP Billboard Top 100 Songs of 2001. Forever in our hearts.)
Someone said to me awhile ago: OMG! Did you see the new trailer for Star Wars: Return of the Rogue Hope Bot Clone Jedis? Don’t the teddy bear people look awesome? The CGI is like, OMG, the fish head people look so real. What if they kill Luke? I’m gonna cry so hard when Carrie Fisher…
And I was like, Whoa, slow your roll, nerd.
Um, noooooo. I haven’t seen the new trailer for whatever random Star Wars they’re putting out this month, and I probably won’t hear about the subsequent 9 million ones either because, lets face it, there must be more nerds out there than we realized for this insanity to continue to make money. Anyway.
They were like, How did you not see it? It’s all over Facebook! Everyone is sharing it! You had to at least have seen the ads for the t-shirts! And that’s when I realized that not everyone understands how social media works.
These > Star Wars
I wanted to say, Wait, you didn’t see the LilyVanity rhinestone encrusted pink ballet flats? They’re all I see. And what do you think the picture-taking vs. picture-posting ratio is with mothers of children under 10? Scary thought. Doesn’t anyone value their social status over their love for pyramid scheme-y wrinkle cream anymore? Oh, my bad. Maybe you don’t see that stuff. Only I do. Because we create our own social media worlds. And then we live in them. I know I see this stuff because I choose to follow these people. All my ads are geared specifically to me based on things I’ve clicked on, liked, opened and Googled. All that info gets funneled into an algorithm somewhere (probably by Star Wars nerds who make more money than I ever will) and voila! A social media world built just for us- as unique as a fingerprint. Guys, Big Brother lives in our phones and computers. Did you really think Star Wars: The Phantom Skywalking Teddy Bear Strikes Back was literally at the center of EVERYONE’s universe? Joey. Joey. Joey. Honey, no.
I probably find 75% of what I see on social media annoying. I could easily unfollow these people. (Not unfriend them- that’s just mean. You can’t help what you love, and it’s cool when people are passionate about something in their lives and put that out there.) I could unfollow. But I DON’T! Why? Because that, my friend, is a dangerous slippery slope. Say you tailor your social media feed by weeding out people with different interests, politics and religions than you. You don’t see their stuff anymore. Eventually you’ll forget you unfollowed these people. So then all you see are posts for things you agree with and ads for stuff you like. The world makes sense! Everyone is speaking your language! Great!
Nope! Not great! You’ve just created your own echo chamber. You’ve convinced yourself that everyone thinks and believes like you. Everyone likes what you like! They vote for YOUR candidate! They buy what you buy! But listen, that’s not true. And it’s a dangerous mentality to have. We’re building our own brick walls of prejudice around ourselves.
I see racist slogans or politics from kids I taught 7th grade to who aren’t old enough to vote, or the one millionth meme of a mascara-smeared crying girl that says “I wish I was pretty. Type AMEN if you think I am” and like-minded dumb crap like that that people post, but I don’t mute it or block it or unfollow it. I don’t want to develop the mentality that my thoughts/personality/interests are “right” or “better” – I don’t need to have my beliefs confirmed. I want the diversity of other people’s opinions, because without them, I’d lose the ability to understand the world and the changes within it. To me, that’s an unforgivable act of selfish, close-mindedness. If you accept a person as your “friend” then be their friend and look past your differences. Of course I don’t condone hate and evil. Be discerning. But a rainbow wouldn’t be as pretty if it was all one color. You know?
That being said, can we address something? Namely how living in our own echo chambers has created the shitshow that is Facebook Politics. I’m going there for one paragraph. Indulge me: We are the stars, the suns, the centers of our own worlds. So there are basically over 7 billion individual metaphorical planets out there spinning into each other, marrying, killing, drinking lattes, choosing not to wash their hands after using the restroom and such. Get it? Okay. Serious moment: It’s impossible to have a system of politics that works for (and unifies) everyone. Even within our own cities lie vastly different worlds; one size just doesn’t fit all. That’s why I get livid when friends argue politics on social media and support that mess with fake news articles from junk sources. (But Kelly, everyone is doing it! No, only YOUR FB friends are doing it. Your echo chamber, remember?) First of all, to publicly put that all out there, how socially inept are you? Omg. And second, FYI, your views only apply to the understanding of your own experiences. You back what makes sense for you. My life might be nothing like yours, so I might not back what you do, but unless we are extremely close, you’ll have no damn idea what I back. Why?
Because I value my personal relationships over my political beliefs. I WILL NOT argue with you. Ever. I’ll love you anyway and recognize that our paths must have just been really different. Then I’ll move on. Not everyone can do that, but for heaven’s sake, don’t say you’re “right” and someone else is “wrong.” That’s just ignorance. People say: Remember not everyone was raised like you. Well, sometimes, even people who were raised like you, at the same time, in the same house have different beliefs than you. Oh well. And if you’re the type who argues with internet trolls over politics while ignoring texts from friends, well, you need to re-prioritize, bud. Mother Teresa once said she would never attend an anti-war protest but to invite her if there was ever a peace rally. Preach, girl! It’s a mindset. Focus on making a positive outcome, not complaining to “have a voice.” Read. Ignore. Whatever. Just don’t mute it all away and forget it exists.
Selfie inception. It's lamer than it sounds...
That was a long paragraph on a topic I hate. To those still reading: Forgive me. What I’m saying is… keep your perspectives broad and be super careful with this new-age power of LIKING and UNFOLLOWING. Don’t live at the center of your own echo chamber. Don’t build your own room of mirrors. You started an online business selling stuff? Good for you and your ambition, girl! You run your own fan page for this or that? That’s awesome, and I’m gonna support it. Go ahead and share your make-up tutorials, I like those. Share your selfies. Confession: I LOVE THOSE. I will like up almost every selfie you ever post because I love to see the faces of the people in my world. If you confidently clicked a pic, I support that all day, no matter what you look like. And go ahead and share your Star Wars: Episode IXII Revenge of the Wookie stuff too, I’ll love on you anyway. It’s who I am. And I love that there are things that YOU love. And I love how different we are. And how similar. And that’s why we’re friends, my friends. -Kelly